TWO WAYS TO BE WISER
Proverbs 29:11 and 20 NKJ
11 A fool vents all his feelings,
But a wise man holds them back.
20 Do you see a man hasty in his words?
There is more hope for a fool than for him.
The book of Proverbs has practical wisdom for everyday living. As you read the Proverbs on a regular basis, you will begin to see patterns and themes emerge. One of the themes is the actions and resulting consequences of foolish people. By simply applying the wisdom in these verses, we can save ourselves untold problems and heartaches.
Verse eleven references a foolish person venting all their feelings. Other translations speak of venting anger. I believe we can make a case for both. Venting anger is not a mark of wisdom. I don’t know that I have ever vented my anger, and when I was finished, felt good about it. And because I have quite the track record of venting my anger, especially at home, I can assure you my family was not blessed. One of the challenges we face as a society is the idea that venting or expressing all our feelings and anger is a remedy for all the negative emotions we may be dealing with. Just let it all out is frequently given advice. The basic premise is that all these negative feelings of anger or despair are bottled up in us and need to be released. And yet, the Bible offers different counsel. The scriptures support holding these negatives in as opposed to letting them out. I am sticking with the scriptures. Venting has never helped me. Gaining control of my negative emotions and feelings is the spiritually wise position that pays off in the long run. How many people have vented and seen their words hurt someone and make the situation worse?
Verse twenty is similar in that it depicts the actions of the foolish person as being someone who is quick to speak. He is quick to give his opinions. Quick to share without thinking. This proverb is even more blunt in its assessment of this person. There is more hope for a fool. Ouch! In the book of James in the New Testament, we are instructed to be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to get angry. Notice that James does not leave room for venting any feelings.
APPLICATION
The problem with venting is that it doesn’t let anything out. Rather, it strengthens the negatives that we are already dealing with. People have all kinds of ideas for “blowing off steam.” One of my sons, who will remain nameless, wanted to vent some negative emotions and hit a heavy bag he had in his room. There is nothing inherently wrong with hitting a bag. But it’s not going to solve any problems, and if you hit it without gloves, you stand a good chance of bloodying up your knuckles.
God’s wisdom involves exercising self-control over our words and feelings. We will wind up in a better place. Gain greater control over negative emotions and feelings. And without a doubt certainly appear wiser.